Bad News

I forgot to hit record tonight. My boys (by which I mean my boy) were fighting today.

The most important parts that y'all didn't get to see was Tad's ego (self) taking total control due to having slept for two night in a row. He was also in control during the talk with Saini yesterday. And he also was in control when he tried to call Jackie Leggs, whom Pixie told Saini also does therapy.

The ego is supposed to be in control. It takes cues from the devil (id-sleeping) and the angel (superego-awake) on it's shoulders, but it is supposed to be the driver. So it is good when the ego is in control.

Tad went to go look for a damn tree. And he found one. Right by a creek. And he texted Tessa even though he knew it might cause problems if he broke again. Which caused a huge problem. Because he's still not out of the woods. He wrecked his car, flew through the windshield and broke again.

So devil and angel started fighting. Devil found Tessa's bike on its side in the food court garage again. Grabbed some food. Angel took over to do some Mosley's. Devil took them to the second drop spot. Was disappointed there was nothing there. Angel took them all the way back home, trying to get them to go to sleep. Devil checked the phone. Saw the text. Called Tessa.

Then there was this argument in the car. About how her reaction was proof that Tad doesn't deserve love. Because he's a monster. And soon Saini and Raul and all those people who give him the time of day will realize it. And OF COURSE Tessa reacted like that, did you HEAR yourself? She probably would have reacted that way even if you didn't sound so menacing because you've been basically threatening her over texts for days! Also they fought a lot about the "devil's" driving. Which was bad. Was really messing up Tad's car he just fixed up to 100%. Self took control and made them walk to the tree. Started writing through this. But the road nearby was too loud. So that tree no longer works.

Don't know how I am going to deal with that. Tad might be fine. I don't know. That'll be a roll.

Then devil Tad got behind the wheel again. He wanted to go FAST. And eventually the car was smoking and Tad was bleeding out. He managed to bandage and repair the ouchies. Tad's self took over and made them go to sleep. Mostly because I needed to eat dinner. But now I'm writing this instead.

I might hop back on later.

This was a super hard post to write. I, personally, can't wait for Tad to get fixed. But he desperately needs a therapist.